As we all get older, we will experience life and death. Watching family and friends having babies, bringing in new life into this crazy world. But unfortunately, we will also experience the loss of life too. Losing loved ones to disease, disaster, crime, and natural causes. Every experience has a chance to teach us more about our life. However, it can also show us how we should live our life. Grieving the loss of family and friends is natural. And everyone grieves differently. There is no right or wrong way.
Choices
Recently, we found ourselves making the hard choice of saying goodbye to a beloved pet. They gave us 13 years of laughter, frustration, love, and we wouldn’t have changed a single second of it. But I found myself reflecting on my actions and emotions as I watched the rest of my family mourn the loss of this member. I discovered how differently we all approach the loss. As some cried so violently, others shed some tears and stayed quiet. I found myself quiet and stoic with just a few tears.
Grief
As I have navigated through losing my father and now the passing of 2 pets over the last couple of years, I often worried that I was not mourning right. But when I had to face a friend stepping away from me for a while, my reaction was much different. I cried often, worked through depression and anger, until I pulled myself out. Was any way wrong? No. Mourning is the chance to reflect on the love we have for these people and our pets.
Depression
The difficult element with mourning and grieving, is to be able to keep yourself from being depressed. It is very common to develop depression. The thoughts of not being able to live any kind of life without this loved one on earth can be daunting. Discovering that the life you have been living has suddenly changed, can be very scary for some.
Saying Goodbye
When a loved one (whether person or pet) passes away, it gives us an opportunity to think about this past life and see how things were good and some things that maybe could have been better. When my dad passed, it showed me that you cannot just expect to see tomorrow. He felt fine, until he had a routine procedure. Only to have a tumor be aggravated. My dad had always made sure that his baby girl knew how to take care of herself. But his passing also made me realize that I wish I had more tender moments with him. And that I want my friends and family to remember me in a certain way. Have I been the type of person I want to be remembered as? What kind of legacy would I leave behind?
Natural
Life and death are natural. The problem is both can be unexpected. Precious life coming into the world is a pleasant emotion. A gift to families. But death brings sorrow. Especially when it happens suddenly. To help yourself and others manage their grief, try to remember some of the good times, the funny antics, all of the precious moments these loved ones gave you. Try to remember how they taught you to be the person you are today. Grief and mourning are natural and should never be criticized. Mourn how you best feel. Whether you grieve a death of a person or pet, or you are grieving from the loss of a friendship or relationship, let yourself feel, process, and learn. You will find yourself better from the time you had.
Enjoy this video.
With great warmth,
