Lately I have had a heavy load of emotions in my life. Like a rollercoaster going through endless loops. One minute I am happy or relaxed, then suddenly I am fighting depression, sadness, and hurt. I have a few people in my life that I can reach out to, but there is always one thought that tends to stop me. “I don’t want to bother them with my problems.” There is something else that happens. My friends have their own lives and ups and downs. They know they can come to me at any time. But they don’t always reach out. Why? Because of, again, “I don’t want to bother you with my problems, ESPECIALLY when you have your own to deal with.” How does one person help another when they both are in need?
Helping Each Other
Since I have been writing this blog, I have come across so many quotes about life. So many that almost conflict each other. We are taught to care for others. To respect others, to be there for our family and friends. In the same breath, we are taught to make ourselves priority. To focus on ourselves because we are strong on our own. Can two people help each other?
Who are your friends
First of all, we need to break the way of thinking. These people we call friends, the ones that are at that level they are loved like family, are in your life for a reason. You trust them, care about them, and are comfortable to listen to them. These are people that probably have seen you at your worst and are still in your life. I am not talking seeing you in the morning with bedhead and no coffee. This is the time when you may have had too much to drink, or you were crying because of a breakup or worse. But now, you both need help. Now what?
Listen to Help
Simple, you both listen. Their problems are no more or less important than yours. They are just different situations. Maybe you are dealing with similar situations or complete opposites. In either case, you listen. You care about them, and you be there. Just like they would for you. Even if you are at your lowest and so are they. You talk. Because one of the worst things that can happen if you don’t is that you lose yourself AND you lose them. No one wants to see a world like that.
Is it easier said than done, absolutely! Especially if you are in the middle of a situation yourself. Here is one way to look at things. Maybe taking a few minutes to focus on your friend or family and their troubles can distract you a little. It could be that time of distraction that clarity of your own situation could come forth.
The Best Gift in Life
One of the greatest gifts we have in life is our friends. We have acquaintances, close friends, good friends, and then we have “those friends”. You know the ones. They are the ones that will drop everything to help you. Not afraid to tell you how it is. The ones that will show up at the door with ice cream and wine ready to start the party. These people are your family, even if they didn’t come from the same parents.
Always Ready to Help
So, if you ever worry that you may be bothering me to vent your problems to, just because I have so many of my own, don’t. Because to repeat a quote I just read, “I would rather hear about your problems, then attend your funeral.” You will ALWAYS be able to count on me to listen, empathize, care and help you no matter what I am going through.
With great warmth,
