There are so many of us that have experienced traumatic events in our lives. Some of these things happen quickly, while others occur over long periods of time. Eventually we get to a point (I hope) where we are ready to get help. That we are tired of how we are living, and we want to be happy again. We will seek out professional help or maybe reach out to our friends and family. No matter how, we start to work on ourselves. But too many of us forget, no matter what happened or how long it was, healing is a process. There are no clear steps to happiness. Instead, it feels like a wall of branches, farther than the eye can see, and each one leads to another.
Steps
One of the most highly acknowledged and longest running effective program is the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). This program started in 1935 and is still running now. Allowing anyone, regardless of reason, to join their meetings. To learn how the 12 steps can retrain their minds and behaviors when alcohol is present in their lives. How each one is able to thrive in an environment that advertises and promotes a substance they or their family and friends are addicted to. But this is only one piece of the healing process. I believe these steps lead through a thicket of branches too.
Branches in life
As anyone with a disease or disorder will find, life is not always kind. We wouldn’t have phrases like, “one step forward and two steps back” or “fall seven times and get up eight.” When I think of steps, I think that once I get through this one, I will go onto the next. But healing does not always work that way. Think of it this way. Picture a tree, any tree. All the branches are going in all different directions, with most of them leading upwards. Some are thin and fragile; others are thick and sturdy. There may be some branches that span out to more branches.
As I am healing from depression and anxiety, I am finding that I am sitting on this branch, and I am faced with more in front of me. There will be times that I will grab a branch and it falls. So, I grab another and hope for a stronger one. I don’t know where my healing is taking me. I just must accept that I will have days where my branch is too fragile and there will be a rough day.
Not to fall to the ground
I have a friend that has a beautiful soul but has been through a lot. In talking with this person, we were sharing our feelings about how, as we heal from our trauma, it is very difficult to accept something good in our lives without the worry of the branch crumbling. Recently I talked about triggers. When someone has been through a life of physical and mental abuse, it is very common to have a trigger or to constantly question if you are allowed to do something. Add in the possibility of someone nice, offering you a chance to do something you want (olive branch), the mental debate is relentless.
I feel that healing is not a step program, but a forest of branches we are climbing through. So different sizes and shapes. Some leading upwards, some pointed down. And here we are trying to climb through, trying to make our way to the top, to the sunlight. Our mission is to make it to the light and warmth, without falling to the ground. The physical challenges add to the mental dispute we fight through. Sometimes we have help and sometimes we are alone. As long as we remember, never to give up!
Enjoy this video.
With great warmth,
