That intense feeling you have from the loss of something special or that that one person that meant the world to you that is now missing from your life, that is grief. What is grief? Grief is an emotion we all experience. What is different, is how we cope with grief.
Emotions of Grief
The last few days have been a myriad of emotions for me. Beginning with the anxiety I experienced while driving from Arizona to California. Because the cusp of all my emotions came forward this past Saturday, when my Dad had passed away. The opportunity to have my entire immediate family in house with my Dad is a memory I will always hold. As he had been sick for such a short time, the overwhelming emotions began to bottle up.
Grief is an emotion that impacts each of us in unique ways. My brothers became quieter, but still very focused on tasks at hand to make sure Mom was taken care of. My Mom is my Dad’s one and only love of his life. As so many spouses experience, the loss of such a love is overpowering. Then there is me. The power of the emotions I held onto made me numb. I didn’t know what to think, feel, or act at times. Trying to be strong, care and hold my Mom, while working through tasks and my own life challenges.
Just feel
There is no one way to feel. No one way you should be when you are faced with grief. Your mind and body will work through this powerful emotion. If it takes days of crying, so be it. Or if it is no emotion, just watch out for that one day when you will need to release. It is never good to hold onto emotions for too long, so remember to allow yourself to feel even for a night or an hour.
I found a quote, “Grief is like the ocean, it comes on in waves, ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim. -Vicki Harrison” Give yourself the chance to feel, to ride the waves. Because the more you work through, the less of an impact the grief becomes. Before you know it, it will be the memories that get you through the days.
(Dedicated to my Dad, Lawrence Szatkowski, 1946-2022)
With great warmth,
