Ever get to the point in life when you are ready to throw your hands up and scream? Frustrations and anguish seem to be coming from all sides at you. Almost at a point of seeing no light at the end of the tunnel. When is enough really going to be enough? If it is enough, then what? What can you do? A time when it feels like life keeps throwing obstacles at you. Making you wonder if you are strong enough to get through life. Questions of why is this always happening to me? Or why can’t I just get a break? I don’t know if I can take anymore.
Feeling Needed
I have had times when I feel like everyone in my life needs me and my time. This was okay, at first. But to be selfish…what about me? When you have so many people taking time out of your life, when do you have time for you? Then those times became more and more frequent and I started losing myself. My needs and wants started to drop by the waste-side. Then suddenly, so did all of my emotions. I began to shut down emotionally.
A friend asked me if I was happy. I couldn’t answer them.
Happy Enough
I remember years ago I would get a burst of happiness. The days were brighter. I had energy to burn and there were not enough hours in the day to contain me. You would find me dancing around the house between cleaning or just dancing and enjoying music. I wanted to move. Laughing and excitement burned through me. Those days came once in every 3 months to start. Then became once in 6 months. Now, I can’t remember the last time I felt that way.
Awareness
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. There are people in the world that are saying, “I don’t know if I can take anymore.” Whether it is you or someone you know and love, the answer is…You don’t have to take anymore alone. The pain, hurt, and anguish you are feeling right now, let someone help you carry the burden. Enough is not yet enough for you. Let us help you lighten the load.
When is it enough
I have been asked many times, when is enough going to be enough? I have had my share of frustrations, pain, and struggle. I have found a way to deal with my struggles in ways that found myself shutting down. A friend has recently pointed out that they are seeing me fading and get lost in life. My personality and my being are getting absorbed into my life that what I once was, is disappearing. It took them to open the box I stored all of my emotions in and help me to realize the path I was heading.
Life is precious
Not everyone has that special person in their life that is outside the main bubble, able to see the pathway we are traveling. That is why I wanted to talk about this today. Life is precious and each one of us have a role to play in the story of life. To lose the essence of any character is a tragedy of its own.
Losing the way
Once I realized what was happening, I knew I had to do something. But what really sealed it for me, was my dad. I was able to visit with him a few weeks ago and we talked about my life and what I was feeling. The look on his face when I mentioned about the path of losing myself, it hit me hard. The look of complete and utter devastation on his face. Then he said, “No! You can’t lose yourself. You are too special!” I will never forget that moment. That look and those words from a man that was already in the middle of his own struggles.
You are enough
We are all too special to lose ourselves. If you are starting to ask the question, when is enough going to be enough? Asking the why me? Or wondering when is it ever going to end? It is time. To say it is enough to know that I need to help to carry my burdens. It is enough to say that I can’t do it alone. Enough to know, it is time to get help. But please. I beg, do not ever say, it is enough to no longer go on. Because, although I may not know all of you, I can truthfully say, you are special. You are needed. And you are never truly alone.
National Institute of Menal Health
With great warmth,
